35 Weeks

Monday marked 35 weeks! Time has flown by and I can't believe we've already made it to this point. When we went to our check up, Dr. Milner checked the heartbeats and they were perfect. He said I was a tad swollen, I didn't see it. 

The Thursday before I went to see him because my back was really bothering me. They wanted to make sure I didn't have a kidney infection or that I wasn't having back labor. I didn't have either. It was at this appointment that he recommended that I not go back to work. He wanted me to be able to take it easy, and he knew with me being a teacher, that really wasn't possible being at school.

This is my second week being at home and it's probably a good idea I didn't go back to school. I am REALLY uncomfortable! When I sit or stand for even ten minutes, my back and front really start bothering me. I am also now at the stage where NO maternity clothes fit. Everyday my wardrobe consists of sweatpants and a select few of Darrell's large shirts (many of those don't even fit)!

Needless to say... I'm ready for the kiddos to get here. The goal is to get them to 36 weeks, which is Monday! Once we get there, bring it on!!

The nurseries are pretty much ready. We have a few more things that I've ordered to hang on the walls. The bedding came in and we LOVE it!! I'll make a post about the rooms when everything is finished.

So now we just wait! We're praying for two HEALTHY, strong, and happy babies!! Hopefully we'll get to meet them sooner than later!

Christmas at the Cemetery

Darrell and I went out to the cemetery today after church to decorate. That's one thing both of our kids loved (especially Cade)....decorations for ALL holidays!

I know I say every year that this time of year is tough for us. I was just thinking the other day about how much I miss my little movie watching sidekick. Cade loved a good Christmas movie as much as his mom. Every night we would manage to find a movie on TV. All the lights would be off except for the lights on the tree and mantle. Cade would crawl into the hole of my legs and we wouldn't move until the movie was over...I sure do miss that. Addi, on the other hand, was a big fan of the Christmas music specials. She loved to dance and dancing to Christmas music was no exception! Sometimes she would even get mad when the commercials would interrupt the music...I sure do miss that too!!

This year we still struggle with the with not having Cade and Addi here, I'm sure we always will. But this year we also have the excitement of two more precious babies joining our family! I can't even put into words how happy we are about what's to come! 

Happy Thanksgiving

I think that today is one of my favorite days of the year.  It's a time to truly reflect on your life and appreciate all that God has given you.  This time of year is always emotional for Darrell and me because of the time spent with family.  It's tough not having Cade and Addi here for all of the obvious reasons.  But our God is an amazing God and we are forever thankful that we had both of them for the time that we did, even if it wasn't for that long!  Both of them brought so much joy to our lives and we are truly blessed to have had that time with them.  So many times we get asked how we do it...get through life after losing both of our children.  The one and only answer is God!  He is the one constant who never changes, no matter what.  Because of Him we are able to get up every day and live life the way he intended us to live it!  We know that He is in control and He has special plans for us.  We trust him and lean on Him to guide us!

This year I am thankful for a pretty amazing husband.  He knows just what I need and when I need it.  He has a special way of making me laugh (which lately takes it all out of me...if I get to laughing too hard I can't breathe).  He continues to grow in his faith and I love witnessing that.  We started leading a small group with our church in September and watching him lead has been so awesome!  I'm so glad I have him and LOVE that our love grows every day!

I am thankful for children.  Being a parent is something that I have always dreamed about since I was a little girl.  It wasn't until Cade was born that I truly experienced the kind of love that only children can provide.  Who else do you love before you've even met them.  Words can't even describe how much joy and happiness that Cade and Addi brought us.  And now we wait with excitement for two more children to join our family and make it complete.  Darrell and I are SO anxious to meet Easton and Emerson!

I am also thankful for our families.  We are so lucky to have families who we are so close to and can count on for anything.  No matter what, they are always there and will do anything for us.

And I'm also thankful, right this moment, for extra large clothing to cover my extra large belly.  Don't get me wrong, I have always been a lover of a good pair of sweats, but now, more so than ever, they make me REALLY happy!  It's the little things, right?!?!

We hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

TIme is Flying-28 Weeks

Monday marked 28 weeks!  Now that I'm back at work, the time is flying by.  I only have 8 to 10 weeks before Easton and Emerson are here.  Our 28 week appointment went really well.  I'm gaining weight (maybe not so good), but both kiddos are growing like they should.  Emerson was measuring 27 weeks and 5 days and Easton was measuring 28 weeks and 3 days.  Dr. Milner was very happy with how everything looked.  The ultrasound was pretty entertaining because for a few minutes we were trying to figure out whose head belonged to which body!  Ha!  Now I will be going in every two weeks for appointments....again, CRAZY how we are already at this stage.

28 Weeks

The past four weeks have gone really well.  I feel good, but I am getting huge and it's starting to get really uncomfortable in the evenings.  I'm moving a lot slower and can feel myself getting even slower as the day progresses.  Sleeping is always an issue, I can't seem to find a good position to sleep comfortably in.  Oh well!  The babies are moving like crazy and I really enjoy feeling them move, even though, at times, they can be a little rough!

Progress is finally being made on the nurseries.  I finished getting Cade and Addi's things packed up and put away and I'm glad that part is over.  Darrell and his dad started painting the nurseries today and will hopefully finish tomorrow.  I'm really excited about starting to get the nurseries put together.  Pictures will be posted as soon as they are done...probably won't be any time soon though.  I don't think their bedding will be ready until I'm around 32 weeks.

Everything else is going well!  Darrell and I get more and more excited every day.  We can't wait to meet these precious babies!!

24 Weeks

Three words...time.is.flying!  It's really crazy to think that I am already 24 weeks.  I went to the doctor last Monday and we were able to hear both heart beats without doing an ultrasound.  Easton was 144 and Emerson was 156.  Dr. Milner did do a quick ultrasound and they looked good.  He didn't take any measurements, but he liked how everything looked.  Right now Emerson is breech and is baby A which means she is the lowest.  Easton is transverse, which means he is side to side.  He is baby B so he is higher up.  At this point I am feeling them move all of the time and I really love it!  It can get a little crazy when they are moving at the same time.  I'm just getting bigger and bigger.  I'm easily tired and am trying to take it easy.  Every day after school, I come home and put my feet up.  

24 Weeks

Our 28 week appointment will be the last appointment we have every four weeks.  After that, we move to appointments every two weeks.  Darrell quickly realized that these babies are going to be here quick.  We really need to get moving on getting their nurseries ready.  The planner in me would like everything to be ready by the end of November, of course, sooner is always good too!  We have been busy on the weekends so we just need to pick a day or two and get everything moved out so we can paint and rearrange.  This whole process has been a ball of different emotions.  It's hard to go through Cade and Addi's things and believe me, many tears have been shed.  At the same time we are SO excited and looking forward to Easton and Emerson getting here!

We've had one shower already and are beginning to get stocked up on things for the kiddos.  We are using our study as storage right now until the rooms are ready!  

My mom and I registered at Buy Buy Baby and talk about overwhelming/entertaining/exhausting, etc.  My favorite part was meeting the stroller expert, yes, you heard me, the stroller expert.  We walk over to the stroller department and Steve "the stroller expert" walked up and introduced himself.  First of all this guy was probably about the age of my brother (23) and I thought "you've got to be kidding me.  What does this kid know about strollers?" Well, I learned my lesson about judging because this guy was legit when it came to strollers.  He showed me what he recommended and after about a minute I just handed him the scanner and told him to scan everything I needed.  I was really impressed by ole Steve!

Things are continuing to go great!  Thanks for your continued prayers!

20 Weeks, Well Actually 21

I've made it to 21 weeks and I am officially getting large.  A couple of weeks ago I woke up and noticed a huge change in the size of my belly!  People are now telling me how I've grown and my students even tell me every day, "Mrs. Carpenter, your belly is bigger today than it was yesterday."  They're pretty cute!

The last four weeks have gone by quickly and the nausea is finally gone too.  I think it stopped around 18 weeks.  I'm just so grateful that it's gone and didn't last the entire pregnancy.  A couple of weeks ago my mom and I went and registered.  That's when it really sank in that this is all really happening and will be pretty fast.  I had to keep texting my bestie to see how many of each thing I needed!

I had my 20 week appointment last week and both babies looked great.  They were both measuring what they should.  Easton measured a tad bit bigger than Emerson.  It's always so emotional watching them move around during the ultrasound!

21 Weeks

Everything is good for us around here.  We are now working on nurseries and picking out bedding.  As excited as we are about this step, it is also a pretty emotional one.  We haven't touched Cade and Addi's rooms and we are now having to go through things and make decisions.  I feel like this is the final "big" thing for us!  Man is it tough!!

I know I say this all of the time, but I truly mean it...thank you so much for all of your thoughts and prayers!!

Happy 7th Birthday

Today Cade would have turned seven.  Seven.  It's hard to imagine our little man would be seven years old.  Next week he would be starting second grade.  I'm sure he would be busy with sports and riding his bike.  I'm sure he would be telling Addi to stay out of his room and to not mess with his toys.  Such a big boy, but at the end of the day he would be loving her up, wrestling with dad, and cuddling with mom on the couch...such a love bug.  He had such a big heart!

Seriously Mom, another picture!

Love THAT smile!

I know I say this often, but time has flown by, and yet it feels like he has been gone for SO long.  Not a day goes by that we don't think about him.  Not a day goes by that we wish he was still here.  Words cannot explain how much we miss our Caderader.  But in those moments when I feel like my heart is breaking, all I have to do is think about his smile and how he would wrap my face with both his hands and tell me he loved me!  Darrell and I know that we will see him again, and who could hope for anything more.  Happy Birthday sweet boy, we love you right up to the moon and back!!

How he slept every night...the only time he would suck his thumb

So stinkin cute!!

16 Weeks AND We're Having...

Last week I was 16 weeks and we had an exciting appointment! Both babies looked good with strong heartbeats. The last four weeks have gotten a little better as far as the nausea goes. I'm still getting sick from time to time and I'm pretty tired at the end of the day. I have felt them move a couple of times, but no big movements.

          Me at 16 weeks

Darrell and I wanted to have a gender reveal party and our doctor kindly did an ultrasound to see what we are having. I thought it would be WAY more exciting if Darrell and I didn't know either, so Dr. Milner let us see them on the screen and then would tell us to turn our heads when he looked for gender.

The reveal...Saturday evening we had our family and friends come over to find out what we were having. I had my sweet friend, Diane, make a cake for the reveal (she was the only one who knew the gender from Thursday to Saturday). When we cut into the cake we would know what we were having, so that's what we did!! I was so anxious and excited!!

          Loved how the cake turned out!!

          Starting to cut the cake.....

AND.......

We found out its A BOY and A GIRL!!! There weren't many dry eyes in the room! Darrell and I are ecstatic! God is SO good and we are so excited about the plans He has for us!!

12 Weeks

I made it to 12 weeks and that is a HUGE milestone with twins.  Yesterday we went to the doctor for my 12 week appointment and Dr. Milner said everything looked great.  Both babies are growing as they should.  One measured 12 weeks four days and the other measured 12 weeks two days.  Darrell and I could not get over how active they were.  They were moving around SO much!  It was a great appointment and on our way home I told Darrell how crazy it was that I have TWO babies in my belly!!

The past four weeks have been okay.  I've been really nauseas and sick almost every day.  I'm really ready for that to be over with.  Other than that, everything else is going well.  Time is going by quickly and we're really looking forward to our next appointment because I think we'll be able to find out gender.

Again, thank you so much for all of your continued prayers!!

12 Week Bump

Baby A

Baby B

Both Babies--their heads are touching

9 Weeks and Counting

Last week we went to see Dr. McKenzie to see how the babies were doing. They were great!! They were both measuring 8 weeks and heart beats were 160 and 170. Dr. McKenzie was extremely happy with everything. So happy, that we don't have to go back anymore. I'll continue with my meds for one more week and then I'll be done with those too. On Thursday we had our first appointment with my regular OB. He was happy with everything too!

Right now I'm feeling nauseas off and on and feel like I'm starving all of the time. I've been spending a lot of time on the couch. I'm starting to pooch out already...here we go!

Darrell and I are so excited and last week's appointments made me relax a little. It really sank in that we are having two babies and we can't wait!! Thank you so much for ALL of your continued prayers and support!!

Here I am at nine weeks!

Oh the Sounds of Heart Beats

We had our doctor appointment on Monday and we heard and saw TWO good heart beats!! We were SO excited!! There's something about hearing heart beats through an ultrasound. 

Again I am still really early so we continue to pray that both babies continue to grow strong and healthy! We go back next week to see how things are progressing!

It's Twins!!

I'm so sorry I didn't post this yesterday!!  Darrell and I found out yesterday that I am pregnant with twins.  Everything looked good and Dr. McKenzie was happy with what she saw.  I am still really early, only six weeks along, so we are praying that both babies continue to grow and that we are able to see/hear their heartbeats next week!  It was a very emotional appointment.  My nurse, Barb, was in the room with us too and she was so excited.  She even came over and gave me a kiss on my forehead.  Dr. McKenzie and Barb have made this such an amazing experience and have made me feel so comfortable.  They both obviously know our story and have just really made us feel special.

Another exciting part of the appointment is that I am now able to take the progesterone shot every three days instead of every day.  These shots have caused me A LOT of pain and discomfort!  The shot itself isn't bad, but the pain, welps, and knots that come after it are unbelievable!  So that was good news too!

Thank you all so much for your continued prayers! 

Happy Birthday Addibelle!

Today our sweet Addi would be three years old...that just seems crazy!  I try to think about what she would be like now and I'm imagining she would be quite the sassy little thing.  She was always so sweet, but she definitley had some sass when she wanted to.  These days are always hard.  I can't help but wonder what she would be into now.  She would be talking up a storm, I know, and I wish we could have experienced that.

Kicked back and relaxed

This has always been one of my favorite pics--love her hair!

We cherish all of the time that we had with her and are grateful for all of the memories that we have.  I love that we have so many pictures and videos to look at and watch!  Love that little angel and we know that she is in Heaven just as happy as can be!  Love you right up to the moon and back Addi!!

Just hanging out

Sweet Girl

The Results Are In

Soooo, today I went to the doctor for blood work to see if I am pregnant and it was POSITIVE!! Darrell and I are really excited!! Many tears of happiness were cried today. To be honest, I'm still on cloud nine. We go back on the 28th to find out how many babies there are...one or two!! I'm still taking meds and they will continue for the next few weeks.

Thanks SO, SO much for all of your continued thoughts and prayers! So excited to watch God's plan unfold!

The Day is Here!

The day is finally here!  Saturday (tomorrow) I will have the embryo transfer.  After five weeks of meds, they will be implanting two embryos.  Our egg donor had her eggs retrieved on Monday, and we found out on Tuesday that we had 18 healthy embryos fertilized.  I was told the procedure will only take 15 minutes and that I'll need to be off my feet for the rest of the day.  I'll go in nine days later to find out if I'm pregnant.  It's hard to believe that we started this process at the beginning of November, and tomorrow is the BIG day!

We have had a great experience so far.  The doctors and nurses are wonderful!  They know are story and have been so supportive!!  Thank you so much for all of your continued prayers!

Two Years

Today marks year two that Cade has been gone.  Time has flown by and it feels like he has been gone for so long (I know I say that ALL of the time, but it is so true).  He would be six years old, in the first grade, playing soccer, and annoying his sister.  Nothing changes, we miss him terribly and would give anything to touch, see, and hear him!  When we think about him and look at pictures we always smile.  He was such a sweet boy with a big heart.

We celebrate his life today and celebrate knowing where he is!  How wonderful to know that he is in the most amazing place where everything is perfect!  We love you so much Caderader...right up to the moon and back!!

Buzz Lightyear--we definitely got our money's worth out of this costume!  I remember him wearing it at four with the bottom half way to his knees and the back ripped to make it fit!!

Our precious boy!  Cade and I had a date night at Kemah while dad was away!  Precious!!

Here We Go

Soooo...it's finally time for us to officially get started with the invetro process. The past couple of months Darrell and I had to choose our egg donor and sperm donor. What a process that was!!

As of Friday, March 22nd, our egg donor started her cycle...so that meant it was time for us to get our "calendar" set up. Today (Monday, April 1st) I started on the meds to move us forward. It looks like we will have possible transfer dates of May 2-4 (all of this depends on when they retrieve the eggs from our donor).

I can't explain how excited Darrell and I are about starting this!! We are SO ready to have noise in our house again. We LOVE children and are looking forward to this next chapter in our lives! We pray that everything goes smoothly and that at the end of all this we will have a beautiful child, or two, to share our life with!! Thank you so much for your continued prayers!!

A Year Already

It's hard to believe that a year has already passed since our precious little girl went to be with our Lord.  Time is a funny thing, the year has gone by quickly, but it seems like she has been gone forever.  This past week has been an emotional one.  I miss Addi more than I can explain.  I look at pictures and watch videos and take in those moments as if they happened yesterday!  I miss waking her up in the morning and her telling me "Bow, shoes, teeth!"  I miss her spilling her goldfish and saying, "Uh oh, uh mess!"  I miss her prancing around EVERYWHERE with Mr. G.  I miss her coming around the corner with every single headband hanging from her arm.  I miss rocking in the chair in the living room with her.  I miss her sleeping with Darrell on that same chair when she didn't feel good.  So many things I miss...this list goes on forever.  What a beautiful, strong little girl we had!  We miss her every day, and we are so glad that God gave her to us...even if it was for such a short amount of time! 

Check Up Doctor Appointment

Watching a movie with Mr. G

Playing on the dishwasher

Hanging out at Ashley's

Being silly

Loves to have stuff hanging from her arms

Playing with her baby

Sweet Girl!

If I'm honest, this week was actually more difficult than I thought it would be.  Darrell and I just spent our first year without either of our children, and what an adjustment that has been.  It is quiet in our house and all routine and structure that once existed is no longer there.  It's funny how when you have kids, it's all about a routine.  Now if we eat at 9:00, we eat at 9:00...no big deal (that would have never happened with the kids here)!  I also find myself looking at the pictures on our walls and dealing with that they are no longer being changed out with new ones.  With all of that said, Darrell and I are happy and continue to LOVE each other, probably even more than we ever have!  Emotional moments come and go and I'm pretty certain they always will...we love our kids and miss them dearly.  We have a strong faith and know that God provides us with the strength we need and we know that He has plans for us!  We are surrounded by wonderful people who continue to pray for us and love us and care for us! 

Saudi Heart Walk

A couple of months ago two of our dear friends, Lindsey and Stephanie, let us know that they wanted to do something for us to honor Cade and Addi.  The two of them, with their husbands (Brooks and Micah), organized a walk on their compound.  They sold shirts and pizza and accepted donations that would go towards our invetro procedure.  The event, we were told, was an awesome experience!  They walked in the evening on the beach and finished up right at sunset (what an amazing view)!  The four of them spent some time at the beach when both Cade and Addi passed away just remembering them, releasing balloons, and just praying for us.  How appropriate that the walk would be held at the same location.

Stephanie and Lindsey registering people

Our sweet friends-Micah, Stephanie, Lindsey, & Brooks

The Perry Family

The Sperling Family

Gavin-One of Cade's buddies

Darrell and I are blessed to have them in our lives and the support from everyone in Saudi has truly touched our hearts!  Thank you so much to everyone for continually praying for us and supporting us from so far away!!

Keep the Beat Heart Walk

We did it!  We finished our first heart walk and what a day it was!!  Thank you SO much to everyone who donated and thank you to everyone who came out to walk with us!  Darrell and I were touched by all of the support that we received for our first annual walk!!  We had so much fun and it was so awesome seeing everyone in their Monster Trucks and Tutus shirts, they were everywhere.  The It's My Heart Foundation was overwhelmed by the number of people on our team and the amount of money we raised.  The photography people had trouble getting ALL of us into one picture.  We raised over $13,418!!  Our team received a personalized banner with our logo and Cade and Addi's name on it.  It was really nice!



Me & Darrell with our award for raising the most money



Our amazing family (minus Jimbo-we missed you)

Giving us the banner

Close up of the banner

It was a bitter sweet day.  It was so amazing to be surrounded by SO many people who were celebrating the life of their child, some who are still here and others who have gone to Heaven.  I think that is what I loved most, that everyone there was walking for a common purpose....they were walking for someone they love!  They were walking for a child who touched their lives in so many ways.

Me with my brother and sister (LOVE this picture)

Me with two of Cade's best friends (LOVE them!)

Me with some of my former students (+ one future student)

Me and my crazy dad!

All of the teachers from my school and their kiddos!  There were also many teachers from Mossman--I diddn't have a picture of them (love y'all too)!

Walkers--Look at all of those "85" shirts

I know I've said this a bazillion times, but we are truly grateful for all of you who have prayed for us and shown us so much love and support!  Darrell and I got in the car after the walk and were just in awe of the number of people who took time out of a Saturday to come and walk in honor of Cade and Addi and to support us!!  It touched our hearts more than you'll ever know.  Thank you, thank you!

Our whole team!  Pretty amazing!!